登陆注册
20035200000115

第115章 THE GOD OF COINCIDENCE(1)

The God of Coincidence is fortunate in possessing innumerable press agents. They have made the length of his arm a proverb. How at exactly the right moment he extends it across continents and drags two and two together, thus causing four to result where but for him sixes and sevens would have obtained, they have made known to the readers of all of our best magazines. For instance, Holworthy is leaving for the Congo to find a cure for the sleeping sickness, and for himself any sickness from which one is warranted never to wake up. This is his condition because the beautiful million-heiress who is wintering at the Alexander Young Hotel in Honolulu has refused to answer his letters, cables, and appeals.

He is leaning upon the rail taking his last neck-breaking look at the Woolworth Building. The going-ashore bugle has sounded, pocket-handkerchiefs are waving; and Joe Hutton, the last visitor to leave the ship, is at the gangway.

"Good-by, Holworthy!" he calls. "Where do you keep yourself?

Haven't seen you at the club in a year!"

"Haven't been there in a year--nor mean to!" is the ungracious reply of our hero.

"Then, for Heaven's sake," exclaims Hutton, "send some one to take your mail out of the H box! Every time I look for letters I wade through yours.""Tear them up!" calls Holworthy. "They're bills."Hutton now is half-way down the gangplank.

"Then your creditors," he shouts back, "must all live at the Alexander Young Hotel in Honolulu!"That night an express train shrieking through the darkness carried with it toward San Francisco--In this how evident is the fine Italian hand of the God of Coincidence!

Had Hutton's name begun with an M; had the H in Hutton been silent; had he not carried to the Mauretania a steamer basket for his rich aunt; had he not resented the fact that since Holworthy's election to the Van Sturtevant Club he had ceased to visit the Grill Club--a cure for sleeping sickness might have been discovered;but two loving hearts never would have been reunited and that story would not have been written.

Or, Mrs. Montclair, with a suit-case, is leaving her home forever to join handsome Harry Bellairs, who is at the corner with a racing-car and all the money of the bank of which he has been cashier. As the guilty woman places the farewell letter against the pin-cushion where her husband will be sure to find it, her infant son turns in his sleep and jabs himself with a pin. His howl of anguish resembles that of a puppy on a moonlight night.

The mother recognizes her master's voice. She believes her child dying, flies to the bedside, tears up the letter, unpacks the suit-case.

The next morning at breakfast her husband, reading the newspaper, exclaims aloud:

"Harry Bellairs," he cries, "has skipped with the bank's money! Ialways told you he was not a man you ought to know.""His manner to me," she says severely, "always was that of a perfect gentleman."Again coincidence gets the credit. Had not the child tossed--had not at the critical moment the safety pin proved untrue to the man who invented it--that happy family reunion would have been impossible.

Or, it might be told this way:

Old Man McCurdy, the Pig-Iron King, forbids his daughter Gwendolyn even to think of marrying poor but honest Beef Walters, the baseball pitcher, and denies him his house. The lovers plan an elopement.

At midnight Beef is to stand at the tradesman's entrance and whistle "Waiting at the Church"; and down the silent stairs Gwendolyn is to steal into his arms. At the very same hour the butler has planned with the policeman on fixed post to steal Mother McCurdy's diamonds and pass them to a brother of the policeman, who is to wait at the tradesman's entrance and whistle "Waiting for the Robert E. Lee."This sounds improbable--especially that the policeman would allow even his brother to get the diamonds before he did; but, with the God of Coincidence on the job, you shall see that it will all come out right. Beef is first at the door. He whistles.

The butler--an English butler--with no ear for music, shoves into his hands tiaras and sunbursts. Honest Beef hands over the butler to the policeman and the tiaras to Mother McCurdy.

"How can I reward you?" exclaims the grateful woman.

"Your daughter's hand!"

Again the God of Coincidence scores and Beef Walters is credited with an assist. And for preventing the robbery McCurdy has the peg-post cop made a captain; thus enabling him to wear diamonds of his own and raising him above the need of taking them from others.

These examples of what the god can do are mere fiction; the story that comes now really happened. It also is a story of coincidence.

It shows how this time the long arm was stretched out to make two young people happy; it again illustrates that, in the instruments he chooses, the God of Coincidence works in a mysterious way his wonders to perform. This time the tool he used was a hat of green felt.

The story really should be called "The Man in the Green Hat."At St. James's Palace the plenipotentiaries of the Allies and of Turkey were trying to bring peace to Europe; in Russell Square, Bloomsbury, Sam Lowell was trying to arrange a peace with Mrs. Wroxton, his landlady. The ultimatum of the Allies was: "Adrianople or fight!"The last words of Mrs. Wroxton were: "Five pounds or move out!"Sam did not have five pounds. He was a stranger in London; he had lost his position in New York and that very morning had refused to marry the girl he loved--Polly Seward, the young woman the Sunday papers called "The Richest Girl in America."For any man--for one day--that would seem to be trouble enough; but to the Sultan of Turkey that day brought troubles far more serious.

And, as his losses were Sam's gain, we must follow the troubles of the Sultan. Until, with the aid of a green felt hat, the God of Coincidence turns the misfortunes of the Sultan into a fortune for Sam, Sam must wait.

同类推荐
  • 清代学人列传

    清代学人列传

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 六十种曲义侠记

    六十种曲义侠记

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 平陈记

    平陈记

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 解老

    解老

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 本草分经

    本草分经

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
热门推荐
  • 争夺辣妈:萌宝宝VS腹黑爹

    争夺辣妈:萌宝宝VS腹黑爹

    “宝贝,我是你爹。”“爹是什么?能吃吗?”“爹就是你妈咪的男人。”“错,我才是我妈的男人。”五年前的错误,五年后的重逢。家有小男子汉,辣妈底气十足。想复合,先过宝宝这一关。女儿是老爸上辈子的情人,儿子就是老妈上辈子的情人。萌宝宝:“想抢走我的女人,没那么容易。”腹黑爹:“你妈是大人,不好玩,我送你一个妹妹陪你玩,怎么样?”萌宝宝:“成交。”腹黑爹:“你得先帮我把你妈拐到手,我才能变出妹妹哦。”
  • 公子娇媚相公妖娆

    公子娇媚相公妖娆

    皇家有女,艳动满天下林家有子,呆傻小痴儿原本不会有的交集可是,扮猪吃老虎,斗智斗勇的故事,正在上演……
  • 斗胜武境

    斗胜武境

    拿我试药?哼,我要十倍奉还!我要这武境世界天翻地覆!
  • 恶魔少年的灵修传说

    恶魔少年的灵修传说

    这是地球,但也不是地球。这是一个有关于灵的世界,利用灵发挥强大实力的人被称为灵修者。在这里,几乎人人都可以成为灵修者。一个体内封印了恶魔的少年,闯入灵的世界。请看他会给这个世界带来怎样翻天覆地的变化。“如果还能重来一次,我还是会变成恶魔,因为我不想你死!”
  • 重生复仇:扑倒腹黑男神

    重生复仇:扑倒腹黑男神

    被最爱之人所害。蜕变归来,她要复仇。他爱她宠她。她要的一切,他都会让她得尝所愿。她想复仇,他为她递枪。她想尝试各种新鲜,他为她一一送到眼前。她想踏上巅峰,他为她铺路搭梯。她说:“沈凌越,我最近看上了一个男人,你不是对我一直有求必应的吗,你去帮我把他带过来。”一听这话,某男阴笑。“没错,你也知道我向来是对你有求的,既然你求我了,我又怎么能让你失望?”话音刚落,某女还没反应过来之际,早已经被吃干抹净。
  • 神棍狂妃:邪王宠翻天

    神棍狂妃:邪王宠翻天

    她一个金口玉言能够断生死、掌前程、点龙穴、相风水、懂幻术、辨阴阳……十项全能的二十四世纪阴阳大师,一觉睡醒,就特么地出现在一个闭塞的马车里,还是被人押着去成亲!前有邪魅王爷围堵,后有渣爹毒姐陷害,好在,吃饭的本事还在。顾念微小手一挥,收王爷,踩渣渣,一路招蜂引蝶,一路嚣张狂妄,在异世界混得风生水起。--情节虚构,请勿模仿
  • 听说大叔爱萝莉

    听说大叔爱萝莉

    这是一个关于腹黑沉稳帅大叔和外柔内坚俏萝莉如何从认识到相爱的故事,都市中的温馨爱情。呆萌的木木偶遇了沈昂,两人从被误会开始,一路针锋相对,打打闹闹,最终,成了夫妻。
  • 龙珠传奇

    龙珠传奇

    一颗龙珠,便可飞升仙界,长生不老。一个毫无功法的少年,一次林中的相遇,无意中得到的龙珠消息,使他陷入了修仙界争斗的漩涡之中,且看他如何在神州大地上翻雨覆雨。。
  • 霸道龙神

    霸道龙神

    简介:数百万年前,四大职业,神兵战士,府师,召唤师,神兽战士,平定天下,而后神兽战士的王者,龙神战士,由于过于强大,一旦问世,便遭到各方势力的追杀,逐渐的没落,直至消失,成为传说,只残留几滴精血遗落在世间。世人为了得到上古传承的神龙之血,几番争斗,暗流涌动,一时间天下大乱。一个平凡的小镇,一个身世不明的少年,体内的血脉,却在慢慢的苏醒。身具龙脉,成就世间唯一圣龙之身,号令天下神兽,称霸上古大陆,金钱,美女,地位,神兽,神兵,应有尽有。废材的逆袭之路。
  • 一分钟读懂顾客心理

    一分钟读懂顾客心理

    顾客的心理有多种,其中包括“求实惠”和“求便宜”的心理,对抱有这种心理的顾客,一般可以用价格和产品的质量来说服,重点指出自己产品的“物美价廉”,那么他们就很容易被打动。另外顾客的求“效率”心理,求“舒适”心理,求“安全”心理,求“方便”心理等,在读懂消费者心理的旅途中,本书将为您一一展现!让您在1分钟之内读懂顾客心理,打开顾客的钱袋!