登陆注册
20055200000006

第6章 PICKING UP MISS KIMMEENS(1)

The day was by this time waning, when the gate again opened, and, with the brilliant golden light that streamed from the declining sun and touched the very bars of the sooty creature's den, there passed in a little child; a little girl with beautiful bright hair. She wore a plain straw hat, had a door-key in her hand, and tripped towards Mr. Traveller as if she were pleased to see him and were going to repose some childish confidence in him, when she caught sight of the figure behind the bars, and started back in terror.

"Don't be alarmed, darling!" said Mr. Traveller, taking her by the hand.

"Oh, but I don't like it!" urged the shrinking child; "it's dreadful."

"Well! I don't like it either," said Mr. Traveller.

"Who has put it there?" asked the little girl. "Does it bite?"

"No,--only barks. But can't you make up your mind to see it, my dear?" For she was covering her eyes.

"O no no no!" returned the child. "I cannot bear to look at it!"

Mr. Traveller turned his head towards his friend in there, as much as to ask him how he liked that instance of his success, and then took the child out at the still open gate, and stood talking to her for some half an hour in the mellow sunlight. At length he returned, encouraging her as she held his arm with both her hands; and laying his protecting hand upon her head and smoothing her pretty hair, he addressed his friend behind the bars as follows:

Miss Pupford's establishment for six young ladies of tender years, is an establishment of a compact nature, an establishment in miniature, quite a pocket establishment. Miss Pupford, Miss Pupford's assistant with the Parisian accent, Miss Pupford's cook, and Miss Pupford's housemaid, complete what Miss Pupford calls the educational and domestic staff of her Lilliputian College.

Miss Pupford is one of the most amiable of her sex; it necessarily follows that she possesses a sweet temper, and would own to the possession of a great deal of sentiment if she considered it quite reconcilable with her duty to parents. Deeming it not in the bond, Miss Pupford keeps it as far out of sight as she can--which (God bless her!) is not very far.

Miss Pupford's assistant with the Parisian accent, may be regarded as in some sort an inspired lady, for she never conversed with a Parisian, and was never out of England--except once in the pleasure-boat Lively, in the foreign waters that ebb and flow two miles off Margate at high water. Even under those geographically favourable circumstances for the acquisition of the French language in its utmost politeness and purity, Miss Pupford's assistant did not fully profit by the opportunity; for the pleasure-boat, Lively, so strongly asserted its title to its name on that occasion, that she was reduced to the condition of lying in the bottom of the boat pickling in brine--as if she were being salted down for the use of the Navy--undergoing at the same time great mental alarm, corporeal distress, and clear-starching derangement.

When Miss Pupford and her assistant first foregathered, is not known to men, or pupils. But, it was long ago. A belief would have established itself among pupils that the two once went to school together, were it not for the difficulty and audacity of imagining Miss Pupford born without mittens, and without a front, and without a bit of gold wire among her front teeth, and without little dabs of powder on her neat little face and nose. Indeed, whenever Miss Pupford gives a little lecture on the mythology of the misguided heathens (always carefully excluding Cupid from recognition), and tells how Minerva sprang, perfectly equipped, from the brain of Jupiter, she is half supposed to hint, "So I myself came into the world, completely up in Pinnock, Mangnall, Tables, and the use of the Globes."

Howbeit, Miss Pupford and Miss Pupford's assistant are old old friends. And it is thought by pupils that, after pupils are gone to bed, they even call one another by their christian names in the quiet little parlour. For, once upon a time on a thunderous afternoon, when Miss Pupford fainted away without notice, Miss Pupford's assistant (never heard, before or since, to address her otherwise than as Miss Pupford) ran to her, crying out, "My dearest Euphemia!" And Euphemia is Miss Pupford's christian name on the sampler (date picked out) hanging up in the College-hall, where the two peacocks, terrified to death by some German text that is waddling down-hill after them out of a cottage, are scuttling away to hide their profiles in two immense bean-stalks growing out of flower-pots.

Also, there is a notion latent among pupils, that Miss Pupford was once in love, and that the beloved object still moves upon this ball. Also, that he is a public character, and a personage of vast consequence. Also, that Miss Pupford's assistant knows all about it. For, sometimes of an afternoon when Miss Pupford has been reading the paper through her little gold eye-glass (it is necessary to read it on the spot, as the boy calls for it, with ill-conditioned punctuality, in an hour), she has become agitated, and has said to her assistant "G!" Then Miss Pupford's assistant has gone to Miss Pupford, and Miss Pupford has pointed out, with her eye-glass, G in the paper, and then Miss Pupford's assistant has read about G, and has shown sympathy. So stimulated has the pupil-mind been in its time to curiosity on the subject of G, that once, under temporary circumstances favourable to the bold sally, one fearless pupil did actually obtain possession of the paper, and range all over it in search of G, who had been discovered therein by Miss Pupford not ten minutes before. But no G could be identified, except one capital offender who had been executed in a state of great hardihood, and it was not to be supposed that Miss Pupford could ever have loved HIM. Besides, he couldn't be always being executed. Besides, he got into the paper again, alive, within a month.

同类推荐
  • 五灯严统目录

    五灯严统目录

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 大乘阿毗达磨杂集论

    大乘阿毗达磨杂集论

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 华阳陶隐君内传

    华阳陶隐君内传

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 宗镜录

    宗镜录

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 解酲语

    解酲语

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
热门推荐
  • 筱悠恋枫

    筱悠恋枫

    一朝春逢筱,悠凉知多少?枫桥夜泊舟,恋爱要趁早!这一季的恋爱法则就是:暖暖爱,满满爱(☆_☆)!筱悠恋枫蝶恋尘,花镂微殇雨微歇。一季悠凉半月夜,风轻云淡姻缘结。
  • 最强复制

    最强复制

    复制和粘贴只是电脑程序中一段编码,但是这段编码如果出现在现实世界中,将会带来怎样的改变?食指和拇指来回交搓,楚中天笑眯眯的说:只要有灵石,丹药要多少有多少!只要有灵石,法宝要多少有多少!只要有灵石,一模一样的人都能给变出来!
  • 火影之天地

    火影之天地

    九尾妖狐之初,洪荒天地惊变,一切的故事起源来源于此,被封印的妖狐附在了还是婴儿的鸣人身上,从此开始了一种不一样的童年......
  • 再续神符

    再续神符

    “安胎符,保命符,平安符,止痛符,这些有吗?”“有。”“泡妞符,屠魔符,弑神符,下贱符,这些有吗?”“也有。”“靠,这也有?那什么符是你画不出来的?”“嗯,这个,有用的符,咱没有。”“靠,说了半天,你的符全是中看不中
  • 女红

    女红

    贺红雨和弟弟由父亲的姨太太抚养。姨太太终生不育,为晚年有一席之地,便病态地宠爱“弟弟”。姨太太被两个日本士兵轮奸后,嫁给穷教师段星瑞,在六零年饿死。贺红雨带着三个孩子活了下来,做奶奶后,孙女段采云在上大学后一心想寻找一条女性解放的道路,和很多男人发生过性关系,终生未婚……
  • 攻略校草计划

    攻略校草计划

    时光倒流,某女上演追夫之路,是否可以成功,看某女使劲尽洪荒之力。在追到某男时,某女拉着他的领带,说:“你终究是我的!”
  • 冥府回忆录

    冥府回忆录

    冥界之战,十殿阎王总殿长派四位阎王平息此事,恶魂作乱平息,但冥界伤亡惨重,四位阎王无一幸免,无常二人受命入人间寻其四位阎王转世,期间却重重阻挠,到底是事发有因还是他人从中作梗?一切将由此来开序幕……
  • 魔鼎

    魔鼎

    阻我仙路者,杀之!伴我仙途者,敬之!生死不由命!富贵岂在天!!!看我一鼎在手。将这腐朽的灵界,砸个通透!
  • 中外教育经典故事

    中外教育经典故事

    本书用各种形式的教育故事讲述一些很明白的道理,引导人们用智慧的手段促进孩子的成长。这些故事或来自国外的或来自一线教学的实践,对于教育类人群均具有启发性。
  • 求因

    求因

    游离于常识之外会是什么样的世界?一个少年的成长将会是因为哪些人?纷繁缭乱的世间如何把握本心?举世皆敌该如何自处?千夫所指又当如何面对?当千帆过尽,愿我道恒一。ps:本书又名《姑苏旅行指南》?乛?乛?