"No， not that. The trial flight is put off until day after tomorrow， on account of that Operation. They rushed us for nothing； we hurried ..."
"On account of that Operation！" Funny， limited man. He could see no further than his own platter！ If only he knew that， but for the Operation， tomorrow at twelve he would have been locked up in a glass cage， tossing about， trying to climb the walls！
At twelve-thirty when I came into my room I saw U-. She was sitting at my table， firm， straight， bone-like， resting her right cheek on her hand. She must have been waiting for a long while， because when she rose brusquely to meet me the five white imprints of her fingers remained on her cheek.
For a second that terrible morning came back to me： she beside I-330， indignant. But for a second only. All that was at once washed away by today"s sun—as happens sometimes when you enter your room on a bright day and absent-mindedly turn on the light， and the bulb shines but is out of place， comical， unnecessary.
Without hesitation I held out my hand to her； I forgave her everything. She firmly grasped both my hands and pressed them till they hurt. Her cheeks quivering and hanging down like ancient precious ornaments， she said with emotion：
"I was waiting ...I want only one moment I only wanted to say...how happy， how joyous I am for you！ You realize， of course， that tomorrow or day after tomorrow you will be healthy again， as if born anew."
I noticed my papers on the table； the last two pages of my record of yesterday were in the place where I had left them the night before. If only she knew what I had written there！ But I didn"t really care. Now it was only history； it was a ridiculously far-off distance， like an image seen through a reversed opera glass.
"Yes，" I said. "A while ago， while passing along the avenue， I saw a man walking ahead of me. His shadow stretched along the pavement—and think of it！ His shadow was luminous！ I think—more than that， I am absolutely certain—that tomorrow all shadows will disappear. Not a shadow from any person or any thing！The sun will be shining through everything."
She， gently and earnestly：
"You are a dreamer！ I would not allow my children in school to talk that way."
She told me something about the children： that they were all led in one herd to the Operation； that it was necessary to bind them afterward with ropes； that one must love pitilessly， "yes， pitilessly，" and that she thought she might finally decide to ...
She smoothed out the grayish-blue fold of the unif that fell between her knees， swiftly pasted her smiles all over me， and went out.
Fortunately the sun did not stop today. The sun was running. It was already sixteen o"clock I was knocking at the door， my heart was knocking ....
"Come in！"
I threw myself upon the floor near her chair， to embrace her limbs， to lift my head upward and look into her eyes， first into one， then into the other， and in each of them to see the reflection of myself in wonderful captivity ....
There beyond the wall it looked stormy， there the clouds were leaden—let them be！ My head was overcrowded with impetuous words， and I was speaking aloud， and flying with the sun I knew not where ....No， now we knew where we were flying； planets were following me， planets sparkling with flame and populated with fiery， singing flowers， and mute planets， blue ones where rational stones were unified into one organized society， and planets which like our own earth had already reached the apex of one-hundred-percent happiness.
Suddenly， from above：
"And don"t you think that at the apex are， precisely， stones unified into an organized society？" The ******** grew sharper and sharper， darker and darker.
"Happiness ...well？ ...Desires are tortures， aren"t they？ It is clear， therefore， that happiness is when there are no longer any desires， not a single desire any more. What an error， what an absurd prejudice it was， that we used to mark happiness with the sign "plus"！ No， absolute happiness must be marked "minus"—divine minus！"
I remember I stammered unintelligibly：
"Absolute zero！—minus 273°."
"Minus 273°—exactly！ A somewhat cool temperature. But doesn"t it prove that we are at the summit？"
As before she seemed somehow to speak for me and through me， developing my own thoughts to the end. But there was something so morbid in her tone that I could not refrain...with an effort I drew out a "No."
"No，"1 said. "You， you are mocking...."
She burst out laughing loudly， too loudly. Swiftly， in a second， she laughed herself to some unseen edge， stumbled， and fell over....Silence.
She stood up， put her hands upon my shoulders， and looked into me for a long while. Then she pulled me toward her and everything seemed to have disappeared save her sharp， hot lips....
"Good-by."
The words came from afar， from above， and reached me not at once but only after a minute， perhaps two minutes later.
"Why...why "good-by"？"
"You have been ill， have you not？ Because of me you have committed crimes. Hasn"t all this tormented you？ And now you have the Operation to look forward to. You will be cured of me. And that means—good-by."
"No！" I cried.
A pitilessly sharp black ******** on a white background.
"What？ Do you mean that you don"t want happiness？"
My head was breaking into pieces； two logical trains collided and crawled upon each other， rattling and smothering....
"well， I am waiting. You must choose； the Operation and one-hundred-percent happiness， or..."
"I cannot...without you...I must not...without you..." I said， or perhaps I only thought—I am not sure which—but I-330 heard.
"Yes， I know，" she said. Then， her hands still on my shoulders and her eyes not letting my eyes go， "Then...until tomorrow. Tomorrow at twelve. You remember？"
"No， it was postponed for a day. Day after tomorrow！"
"So much the better for us. At twelve， day after tomorrow！"
I walked alone in the dusky street. The wind was whirling， carrying， driving me like a piece of paper； fragments of the leaden sky were soaring， soaring—they had to soar through the infinite for another day or two....
Unifs of Numbers were brushing my sides—yet I was walking alone. It was clear to me that all were being saved but that there was no salvation for me. For I do not want salvation....
